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| Have you ever gone back and read other people's journal entries? It's quite entertaining. People talking about how they want to be friends with people who they are friends with today. Old boyfriends, crushes, and fights, make-ups and break-ups. I would highly recomend it if you feel like a few laughs. | | |
| Have you ever felt alone? Like the world is just rushing by you and all you can do is sit there and watch it go by. You try to talk with the people who are rushing around you but they don't pay any attention to you. They just keep going until they are so far away from you that you are just left completely and utterly alone. | | |
| Since I've gotten back from camp I've been having such a difficult time rejoining the world again. My mind has been elsewhere. I'm not me anymore and for those of you who truly know me for me not to be myself just, I don't know, doesn't work. I barely talk anymore and I always seem so sad. I don't want to be this way but I don't know how to get out of it. I spent the night over at the Cass' house the other day and that seemed to help a bit and I had a lot of fun just laughing and being me again but I don't know being home I guess I don't know... At first my mom was sympathetic and tried to help me which I felt guilty like it was putting a damper on her day trying to help me. Now it seems like everytime I feel like I do she gets angry which is making it harder to get out of it. We're leaving for our vacation I think either today or tomorrow which I think will help me to rejoin the family again shall we say? I hope so. | | |
| There are little children playing with the "snow" outside...sad. | | |
| Alright I had the strangest dream last night. It was a bit freaky actually. I was at school and we(yes I said we) were in Ms. Fisher's class...only we had to be in the office for some reason. Then at lunch I found out that a bunch of watches had been found and if you wanted it back you had to go now or else they would get rid of it. Sooo I was waiting in line to get my long lost watch (watch where are you I miss yoooou!...ehehm anyway) and I guess it was in between lunches for some odd reason unknown to man because they were closing the little window guys...it was the "holiday" lunch by the way. So I found my watch and was all excited and because of trying to find my watch I was late to band. Don't ask me why band was after lunch but it was. So when I got there Christina was freaking out because she couldn't find her clarinet and I was happy because I realized that i wasn't late because everyone was still running around. Okay if you are still paying attention props for you. Now my dream takes a giant skip and this is where it gets weird and scary... It was after school and there was this huge storm brewing outside and I mean huge. A bunch of people, including me were looking out of the big windows across the street at this big storm (the school is kind of flipped in my dream...actually just imagine those big windows in the cafeteria to be where the staircase is, the wall oposite the band hallway and where they normally are. Confusing huh?) and there was this big scary black cloud. We were all like oh my gosh we need to hurry up and get home before this thing blows us all to bits. So we all start panicking (how do you spell that anyway?) and running around and then suddenly the wind just starts blowing like picking people up and dragging them across the floor blowing and I get pulled towards the doors and run into my old friend Caitlin where I casually say "why hello..." Then I bump into a wall and she gets sucked out the door. What's that about? So I try to fight my way to somewhere safe and wind up in the band room. For some reason behind the band room and past the storage thingies we have this huge access into what appears to be the football locker room. So me, Mr. Pierson and some other people are all trying to determine the safest place for us to be. I don't remember what we chose but the point is that we survived and when it was all over we were going into all of the possible rooms and saw their damage saying things like "if people where in here they would have died" sad I know. Oh and there was also this side trippy thing with a weird and scary animalish thing that was like a red worm that was trying to kill us...buuut we won't get into that.Anyway. So I leave to try and go home and so me Jimmy and Jeremy were trying to make it to our cars. We saw the storm outside the school and were trying to beat it to our cars. So Jeremy and I are like "should we make a run for it?" and Jimmy is like nah I'll pass so me and Jeremy take off running. When we get to the gate it's chained up so we look for an alternate route and wind up outside of my old elementary school which for some reason is outside of the C parking lot. lol. So we make it to our cars and I get in mine and drive off just passing this thing that looks like a Tornado only it's not very wide for a Tornado but it goes all the way up above the clouds (which are white by the way) that are surrounding it. So I drive off home and hide in the downstairs closet to wait out the storm yadi yadi yada my dream is over. Now, can somebody tell me what that was all about? I had a lot of old dreams colliding and for some reason my dreams have followed a sort of Tornado pattern. Iono. anyone got any ideas? I mean that was way out there. I hope that all made sense because that dream was hard to follow. It jumped around A LOT! anyhoo if you have reached this point in my journal entry thingy I applaud thee. Thanks for taking the time to actually read it and...I shall talk to you later! | | |
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